Finding The Strength Inside The Grey – My Thoughts Concerning Brian’s Move to Parler

Hi. At work earlier tonight, I saw a tweet from Brian that made me sick to my stomach.

For those who may not be American and may not realize the true significance of Brian not only joining this alternative social media website, but promoting it? Let me take a minute to explain. You see, during the Trump presidency (not debating politics in here FYI, so don’t try it),  many people got upset that they couldn’t spread his misinformation/lies, or say hateful and bigoted speech without being banned on Facebook and Twitter. So someone with deep Trump ties created Parler and claim it as a “haven for free speech”. What does that mean? Well it means you can lie, you can say hateful slurs, and be a bigot and you won’t be banned for it.

In fact the Google Play App banned Parler from it’s platform today.

“We’re aware of continued posting in the Parler app that seeks to incite ongoing violence in the US,” a Google spokesperson said. “We recognize that there can be reasonable debate about content policies and that it can be difficult for apps to immediately remove all violative content, but for us to distribute an app through Google Play, we do require that apps implement robust moderation for egregious content. In light of this ongoing and urgent public safety threat, we are suspending the app’s listings from the Play Store until it addresses these issues.” (Read the full CNN article here.)

So imagine my shock when Brian promoted the site today. I was at work. I wasn’t home. And while tensions had been building due to Leighanne as I’ve addressed in the past, I let it slide. I have a BSB’s only policy when it comes to my site anyway. Backstreet Boys only, they must be part of whatever it is and not just have it be their kid or their wife, or a brother…whatever. It was easy to just, tell myself Brian hasn’t said anything outright so maybe he’s different. Maybe I shouldn’t have. But he hadn’t said any of those views and as someone who has Pro-Trump family, I gave him a pass. I can get past politics. I don’t have to agree. This isn’t about Biden or Trump or Hillary or whoever! This is bigger than that.

What it comes down to, is that there’s a line…for all of us.

This is mine.

There’s a difference between having different poltical views, and being prejudiced. There’s a difference between being conservative and supporting a bigot. There’s a HUGE difference in supporting a platform that openly allowed people to plan sedition on my nation’s capitol just this week because their candidate LOST. A platform that let’s people spew the hateful rhetoric all they want without anything said about it.

And…I can’t be okay with that.

The thing is, I still love what BSB have been to me my whole life. I love the music, I love the fandom, I just love all of it. This blog wouldn’t exist if I didn’t. And I am struggling really hard here. You likely are too. And you know what? That’s okay. It’s okay to feel everything you’re feeling right now. And to be perfectly honest, the Carters, the McLeans, the Richardsons, and the Doroughs have all at one point or another have made their views clear throughout the past year, honestly and it’s clear they’re not on the same page as Brian. I’m not writing them off for their association with him.

I don’t even know if I’m writing off Brian. It doesn’t feel like it. But…I’m separating myself from him.

It comes down to this.

I just…I can’t in good conscience blog about Brian right now. I can’t. If he ever read this and wanted to have an honest and open conversation? I’d be terrified but I’d want to. I’d want him to see how much he’s hurting fans of other races, of other sexualities, of other views! The fangirl in me wants to believe he’s just not seeing the truth. That he has no idea how much this simple decision hurt us. Then I remember Kevin and I have a hard time thinking his cousin wouldn’t have tried to talk to him before. So it’s hard to say. It’s hard to know.

I’m not walking away from this BSB blog forever.

I know that for sure.

But I need a break from Brian. I want to support the other four and I will. Absolutely will. So for the moment I’m taking a step back from the TDS blog and focusing my energies on Nick. You all know I’ve always been a Nick girl and he’s definitely the most reliably active BSB right now. So I made a new blog and you can find the link right here for Forever Rebel. (Keep in mind this is a work in progress as I launched and decided all this tonight.) You can check out the Twitter I created here though I’ll still be using TDS as well for AJ, Howie, Kevin, and Nick until I sort out my next move when it comes to Brian. As active as Nicks been and what’s to come, I’m really excited to do this for him. I can support Nick without mixed feelings or wondering what he and his wife might say or do next to break my heart. And the hearts of other fans.

I’m human guys, I don’t know what I’m doing here. But I’m trying. Know I love you all, and I support you.

Nothing is easy and we will get through this together.

I hope you all understand.